Today, I'm going to talk about the Nostalgia Critic. He's basically one of the funniest internet celebrities in the world today. His character is that of a cold-hearted, yet hilarious cynic that reviews some of the worst movies of our past and present. So if you've read anything from "Spoiler Alert!", you'd probably guess that he's a huge inspiration for me in my presentation and attempt at relating something in a movie to something absolutely ridiculous for comedic value.
I'm going to outline the top twelve Nostalgia Critic reviews. The criteria involved in determining the top choices is not predicated on the movies he picks, but instead his jokes, his presentation, his enthusiasm, and the overall delivery of his commentary. Here we go!
#15 - Top 11 Drug PSA's
This one is simply brilliant. The Critic works his notorious magic and goofball humor on tearing apart the ridiculous anti-drug public service announcements of the 1980's and 90's. Some of the jokes include the all-famous reaction to the dad talking to the tombstone and the absolutely bewildered response to Pee-wee talking about crack cocaine.
Watch "Top 11 Drug PSAs" here
#14 - The Wizard
A while back, Doug (the Critic) did a review that I keep forgetting about. Anytime I cycle back through and watch my standard playlist of Critic reviews, I always forget about the Wizard review. Anytime I watch it though, it's always a fun one. His hilarious antics during the Lucas montage of Rad Racer with the power glove, his recurring gag of playing that one song from Ferris Bueller's Day Off anytime Lucas does anything. At the end he draws glasses on a picture of Jimmy that makes him resemble the AVGN in a hilarious fashion.
Watch "The Wizard review here
#13 - Star Trek month
That's right, I'm cheating. You'll find I'm going to be doing a lot of that because the five reviews he did for Star Trek month are all stellar and hilarious. His review of Star Trek Generations where he does the Tom Jerry yell when Kirk falls down the mountainside? Playing "Get Ready for This?" the moment Kirk is called upon to save the day? Opening each review with a 60's Batman style recap, complete with even the original music? All spectacular. Out of those, I believe his review of Star Trek: The Motion Picture to be the best, with Star Trek V: The Final Frontier and Star Trek: Generations being a close second.
Watch entire "Star Trek" month here
#12 - The Good Son
This one is unique because Doug apparently had a throat problem during the recording of this review, so he reviews the entire movie in cue-card format. I don't care what anybody says, this review is hilarious. His ending with the robot Macaulay Culkin coming back from death and killing mankind had me laughing pretty hard. The reaction to "Don't Fuck with Me" had me going as well. Just the jaw dropping and prepared cue cards of shock and horror? Priceless.
Watch "The Good Son" review
#11 - Conan the Barbarian & Conan the Destroyer
Cheating again. These two came from "Schwarzenegger month" and are both hilarious beyond measure. It's hard almost to pick which one's better, but I probably side with Destroyer believe it or not. One of my favorite gags is when the Critic feels sorry for saying what he said about Mako and does a prayer type thing with Mako's head appearing. His opening of both reviews reading introductions as Mako himself is something I always imitate, same with his quip about James Earl Jones yelling at his cronies for not guarding the room "while he was a snake".
Watch both "Conan" reviews here
#10 - The Star Wars Holiday Special
I only try to watch this one around Christmas time, and with good reason. It has one of the best endings out of all his videos. Santa Christ gets me every single time. Rob Walker, if you're reading this, you're my hero. The reactions to the Harvey Korman instructional video and the "We hear you've been hiding Jewish Evoks" are entirely hysterical. Also, just because of the repetitive nature of which I've viewed this review, I can probably sing the entire "Santa Christ" theme song without errors. So there's that.
Watch "The Star Wars Holiday Special" review here
#9 - Red Sonja
This one is pretty great. The Critic's "I'm Acting" jab at Brigette Nielsen is always classic, because for the life of her she couldn't act. Noting the fact Schwarzenegger is basically in this movie for no reason is also pretty hilarious. His Arnold accent in this one is the most ridiculous I've ever heard.
Watch "Red Sonja" review here
#8 - End of Days
Another one I watch far more often than I should, and the finale to "Schwarzenegger month". It's a pretty great review because of some of the gags the Critic has that are derogatory to the devil and how it's ridiculous how Schwarzenegger can keep getting the better of him. Also, this is the episode that did the "CAT" gag, which is pretty hilarious in and of itself. If that's all the review was, I'd still be pretty satisfied.
Watch "End of Days" review here
#7 - Bio-Dome
Bio-Dome has Pauley Shore in it. That should be good enough for anyone to make fun of, let alone the Critic and his genius writing. The "I'm Acting" gag of the guy with blue paint smeared onto his face is tops. Plus I love how he recognizes Walter Peck from Ghostbusters and wondering why he made such a piece of shit movie. Did I mention Pauley Shore is in this movie?
Watch "Bio-Dome" review here
#6 - Judge Dredd
This one I swear I watched constantly for like a week straight one summer. The "LAW" musical number is something I quoted for no reason, and it got me to actually watch Judge Dredd for myself, one of the few times a review made me go view a movie for once. The gags and playful comments made toward Schneider are something I quote quite often. Plus, did I mention Doug's hilarious Sly Stallone impressions? My Stallone impression has slowly changed from what it was to sounding more like Doug's impression of Stallone. Easily one of the best reviews he's ever done.
Watch "Judge Dredd" review here
#5 - Good Burger
Another review in which Doug has basically no idea what's going on, and the funny reactions show. His disdain for "Welcome to Good Burger, home of the Good Burger, can I take your order?", his laughter at the fact that Abe Vigoda is in this movie, his relating it to the big Nickelodeon boom of the 90's? It was awesome, and it's one I view too frequently.
Watch "Good Burger" review here
#4 - The Nostalgic Commercials series
Cheating once more! The reviewing of commercials was an interesting idea in hindsight and only actually came as a response to the Critic's review of My Pet Monster. So, Doug took to the television and start reviewing classic commercials from the 80's and 90's. We get hilarious responses from stuff like "Call this number at this ridiculously high-rate", the Cabbage Patch kids where the father calls his mother and says that his three-year-old daughter 'had twins'. Not to mention, Johnson boat motors and the Wonder Boner fish skeleton removal device. All classic, I could watch these whenever.
Watch each "Nostalgic Commercial" review here
#3 - Turbo! A Power Rangers Movie
This one, I can't even put into words how good it is. Reviewing the entire movie in the Command Center, talking to a sarcastic and hilarious Zordon. One of my favorite gags is the Macho Man reference he makes about "Snapping into Slim Jims". Oh, and I can't forget the megazord battle where the Optimus Prime-lookalike crushes the monster without even trying. Plus his power ranger form still has the tie, the beard drawn on, and the hat. Absolutely hysterical.
Watch "Turbo! A Power Rangers Movie" review here
#2 - Moulin Rouge!
This one is one of two (in my own opinion) that are not only hilarious and greatly quotable, but are also a stroke of motherfucking genius. I'm breaking my rule of "no critic collaboration" reviews just this one time. It is absolutely brilliant. The gags made in vain of a movie I enjoy mocking for no reason just make me laugh. The other critics, Nostalgia Chick and Parental Floss (or something) add only good humor to the review. The ending number "Guilty Pleasures" I can also sing for what amounts to no reason. Part of this movie's appeal is that in high school, I jumped on the bandwagon hating this movie until I decided to stream it myself...and I still hated it.
Watch the "Moulin Rouge!" review here
#1 - The Room
This is it. This is the crowning achievement. I love this review so much. So many gags I not only can quote but anticipate when they're coming, I've seen this review so much. The Doc Brown gag to take the Critic into the future just takes me back to high school when I'd watch this review endlessly. Seriously, when Wiseau Films took this review down from Doug's site, I was really sad. It was and still remains my favorite review Doug has ever done. The reactions to Tommy Wiseau's bad acting are priceless, most notably the rooftop reaction. The "Tao of Johnny" is pretty funny as well. Teasing Denny for being a tool, poorly dubbing himself as a jab at the audio engineers, and the always classic "For never has there been a tale of more blow, than this dumbass bitch and her Tommy Wiseau." Ugh, I'm going to watch this review again right now. That's how much I love it. If there's any review of Doug's you wanna watch to get yourself introduced, start with this one. You won't be disappointed.
Watch "The Room" review here
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